On Speaking Like People in Literature

So, my sister and I recently went to see Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, which is something that I would not suggest you do, since the movie was rather horrible, and left me with a variety of pressing questions, such as, was I actually supposed to dislike everyone involved by the end of the film? Also, was Tibby's boyfriend supposed to be a total creeper?

However, these questions are really neither here nor there. They also might not be entirely fair, since I have not read any of the books or seen the first movie.

What I really am interested in is a quote by Carmen, when she says that she wishes that we still talked like the people in Shakespeare plays. I have been thinking about this, and the conclusion that I have come up with is that this would be horrid. What really would be fabulous, in my humble opinion, would be if we all spoke like characters out of P.G. Wodehouse's novels. Wouldn't it be great? Our conversations would be composed of inane observations and half-forgotten poems and misinterpreted Biblical allusions. We'd say "bally" and "tinkerty-tonk" and "with knobs on". We would give each other ridiculous nicknames, and refer to people as "the efficient so-and-so" or "Comrade so-and-so" or "la Last-Name-of-So-and-So". We would always be quoting Jeeves. Or quoting quotes formerly quoted by Jeeves. Essentially, the world would be a lovely happy place and everyone would think that we were mentally negligible. But with hearts of gold.

Ok, so my secret plan is to subtly get people to start talking like Bertie Wooster. I will do it sneakily, to the point when everyone is quoting Wodehouse all the time without actually knowing. Plan number two is to get everyone to read the books, already. You may take your pick.